And they're OFF!

To school, that is. I can't believe it's not even fully halfway through August, and my kids have started school. Katie is a second grader, and Olie begins Kindergarten. As of this writing at 9ish in the morn, he isn't off yet; he attends kindergarten in the afternoon, but still. Man, where did the summer go? And next week, if all the roadblocks that have been thrown in front of me get taken care of, I'll be starting school as well. If I don't, I'll be crying, then looking for the next road.

I'm not used to being the sole decision maker; man, it's hard. There's so many things I have to decide, it's overwhelming, but mainly because I make it so. That perfectionist "can't make a mistake" thing rearing it's ugly head. My van is dying, so I need to make the decision: put $1200 - $2400 that I don't have into it to fix the transmission when it's got 143,000 miles on it, or sell it for $500 and get a cheap, small car? Decided on the car.

School or work? Like I said, roadblock after roadblock keep getting thrown in my face for school, but without the skills, I'll be stuck working for low wages and never getting anywhere. I want, I deserve, to have a job I'm HAPPY at and enjoy doing and feel like I'm contributing to the community, not just answering a phone.

Trip to Michigan or not? The date is perfect, Sept. 14-17 should be beautiful fall colors there, the kids are out of school so they can stay here with their dad, I really want to see my friends Robert, Tara and John, but it's $250 round trip (driving would be almost as much with the cost of gas.) I really want to get away, have a weekend of serenity (my kids being with their dad for the weekend is not serenity, that's boredom in my ol' house. I need the outdoors, good friends, cool breezes, crisp crackle of leaves and smoky scent of a fire warming up the night. I need to get away from ME. But, I also need to be financially responsible. $250 is a lot right now.

As Superchic[k] says "I've got some growing up to do."