Confidence a go-go!

School again. Hard to believe that at 36, I'm back in college. With eighteen year olds. Busty, perky-boobed eighteen year olds. I finished my homework yesterday afternoon, and felt good. The prof had said to practice writing the roman alphabet style at least once, I did it three times, and could see improvement from one sheet to the next. My lines even got straighter; maybe I can draw a straight line to save my life!!!

My thighs are getting a good workout as well, with all the uphill power walking at the college. I like it, I feel good. And the fact that the last three pair of pants I've put on at home didn't fit any more (they were way too loose) makes for a wonderful feeling, too! Except it doesn't feel good to my pocket; I've dropped two sizes since the beginning of summer, so I'mma gonna needa new pants. Who knew that I would be burdened by shopping?!

I haven't done this in so long.....

but in just a few days, I'm going back to school. Despite devilish obstacles every turn I made, I've made it through the process and will be getting my books and starting class on Monday. Scared to death, but that's ok.

And they're OFF!

To school, that is. I can't believe it's not even fully halfway through August, and my kids have started school. Katie is a second grader, and Olie begins Kindergarten. As of this writing at 9ish in the morn, he isn't off yet; he attends kindergarten in the afternoon, but still. Man, where did the summer go? And next week, if all the roadblocks that have been thrown in front of me get taken care of, I'll be starting school as well. If I don't, I'll be crying, then looking for the next road.

I'm not used to being the sole decision maker; man, it's hard. There's so many things I have to decide, it's overwhelming, but mainly because I make it so. That perfectionist "can't make a mistake" thing rearing it's ugly head. My van is dying, so I need to make the decision: put $1200 - $2400 that I don't have into it to fix the transmission when it's got 143,000 miles on it, or sell it for $500 and get a cheap, small car? Decided on the car.

School or work? Like I said, roadblock after roadblock keep getting thrown in my face for school, but without the skills, I'll be stuck working for low wages and never getting anywhere. I want, I deserve, to have a job I'm HAPPY at and enjoy doing and feel like I'm contributing to the community, not just answering a phone.

Trip to Michigan or not? The date is perfect, Sept. 14-17 should be beautiful fall colors there, the kids are out of school so they can stay here with their dad, I really want to see my friends Robert, Tara and John, but it's $250 round trip (driving would be almost as much with the cost of gas.) I really want to get away, have a weekend of serenity (my kids being with their dad for the weekend is not serenity, that's boredom in my ol' house. I need the outdoors, good friends, cool breezes, crisp crackle of leaves and smoky scent of a fire warming up the night. I need to get away from ME. But, I also need to be financially responsible. $250 is a lot right now.

As Superchic[k] says "I've got some growing up to do."

I'm B-AAAAAA-CK!

Hopefully this time for good. First there was the power outage, then I had to get my computer scanned to see if there was anything illegal on it from the ex. Now, I have my world back. Boy, I sure did miss email and google.